Lego diving, iron maidens, cheap dates, etc.

Well, the kids and I made it to Legoland and back safely. In fact, the drive was--dare I say it--leisurely. I maintained a steady 110 km per hour (relax, Mama, that is 65 mph, remember) and I did just fine. I love how trucks have to stay in the right lane going slowly like a long train. But of course, on the left people were zooming by me at about 100 mph. Crazy. We were told not to try to drive like Europeans in American cars. Our cars are generally not made for that kind of speed. But I don’t think any car should drive that fast unless on a racetrack. That is my opinion as a mother. Of course, when I was an indestructible teenager with fast reflexes and no sense, I routinely drove 75 to 85 miles per hour on the highways. Stupid stupid stupid. I definitely had some guardian angels looking after me.

Anyway, the kids and I had a great time together. It was a bit of a bummer that a lot of the rides required one adult per child, which is not the ratio we had with Dave in Virginia. But it was still fun. We had bought an annual pass the last time we were there, which is very much worth the money. Also worth the money is the box of Legos we brought home from the bargain tent gift shop. They had mountains of miscellaneous Lego pieces and we dove through them together for over an hour until we had filled our little bucket. It was such fun, like a real treasure hunt. “Look, I found another wheel! Oh wait, here is a starfish. Wow, look, here is a Viking head. Has anyone seen a pirate flag?” It was a trip.

We have tried to enjoy a few family outings around here before we get settled in a house. Last week during spring break we went to Rothenburg, one of the best-preserved medieval towns in all of Europe. Dave and I had been there 11 years ago on one of our trips before children. We once again visited the Crime and Punishment Museum, which was cool but sometimes hard to explain to kids, what with the chastity belts and iron maidens and such. Instead we decided to focus on the funny things like the tickle torture contraption and those used to hold two arguing people together until they could get along (we threatened to buy one from the gift shop).

Of course, we went to the several touristy and overpriced Kathe Wohlfahrte German souvenir stores there. Geesh. Her stuff is not all that special, and I wouldn’t be surprised if it was made in China. This place, too, was not kid-friendly. The salesladies stalked us like we were wild thieves, which of course made us very uncomfortable. If one of my kiddos so much as pointed too closely at a cheaply painted Christmas ornament they would reprimand them. Then after that we went to the antique toy and doll museum which, despite its name, is also not a great place for children. My kids were not impressed for long with the glass cases full of old toys. Every time they stomped too hard the glass would rattle and I would get all stressed out. I was so glad to get out of there where the kids could chase pigeons in the town square and be kids. They also loved running on top of the wall that still surrounds the city. Very cool.

Oh, but there is one particularly child-friendly place here. It’s the mammoth Swedish chain store, Ikea. Man, I love that place. First of all, it’s cheap, which is rare around here. They have wonderful toys and furniture for kids’ bedrooms, and they have little play stations with wooden games and puzzles in every department. The best part is that they have free childcare with a ball pit and everything. Luke loved it and came out proclaiming he had met several new friends, though he didn’t know their names. Claire, on the other hand, was mad. The German caregivers apparently fussed at her and she didn’t understand what for and then they fussed again. Okay, so that was bad. But Dave and I really did enjoy the 45-minute date, the first we have had in two months. We held hands and daydreamed about cheap laminate nightstands and super-organized closets until time to spring the kids. Romantic.

But with springtime finally here, we are spending more and more time in the ultimate kid-friendly places: playgrounds. And Germany has tons of cool ones. My kids especially love the hugely tall climbing structures and birdnest swings. There they can really be monkeys. I mean kids.